Years ago, I understood I did not always accept blessings I requested because they came in ways I didn't expect. It is *still* humbling to discover that saying "thank you" and being polite dismissed a gift that deserved my full attention. Now, when I am humbled by that realization, I receive both the gift AND a lesson. As I enter a new opportunity,
a new season, a new relationship, a new day, may I remember that what I "need" is not always about what I lack. Let me listen beyond words to hear agreement and acknowledge what binds my heart to others. Let me see beyond barriers and learn to greet Truth openly and without fear. Untangle my questions, doubt, and false beliefs until I realize, that all too often, what separates me from Grace is my perception of how it is offered.
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Are you still in sync with the beginning of the school year each fall? I am. I started school EVERY year without a break for almost 30 YEARS! Every day, another 30 years after leaving "full-time" work in schools, I realize some little bit of wisdom I missed. Each day, I'm pulled by my calling to be a teacher, wanting to instruct others. It's ironic that the MOST IMPORTANT thing I've discovered as an educator is that you don't need me to lecture you! There are lessons all around us if we are willing to absorb a few basic ideas: 1) What bugs me about you is what I need to study and shift within myself. 2) I need to adopt and practice experiences that delight and inspire me daily. 3) I need to fully understand that I am a generous, brilliant expression of the unconditional, eternal Love that decided to bring me to life. Look around.
Feel the pinch, the tickle, the tease. Ego reacts, love lifts, spirit calls us to pay attention; to LISTEN: not to the words~ to the feelings that call us deeper into the lesson. We choose. We create. We connect. To become the best we see, we must release what we like least. We lose enmity and gather grace by noticing how teachers turn the Light Within. I have the most amazing sister. She and her husband met in high school, married within two years of their graduation, and were together until he died at home shortly after their 41st anniversary. (Of course, having lived twice as long with my sister than I did, I admit it may be my brother-in-law who was truly amazing.) We are still grieving that sudden loss, but there is something marvelous about the family he left.
When we were kids, Marguerite had "baby" dolls, but she dressed them in cowboy boots. She was the tomboy, the athlete, ready for rough and tumble. I had pristine dolls, wanted six children, and planned to be a teacher. She wanted to be a cowgirl, and didn't think they were all that different from cowboys. She refused to babysit, no matter how much money she could earn. She married at 19, was a mother at 20, and a grandmother at 36. By the time she was 50, her two children had each been married twice. By the time she was 55, they had been married three times. We did a head count at her oldest grand-daughter's graduation. From two children with three marriages, she had become NANA to a baker's dozen grandchildren and step-grands, and called that by every friend of all those grands. Her grand and step-grandchildren ranged from ages 21 through a few months. Within a year, she added another TWO grandchildren. Her house at Thanksgiving is "the Brady Bunch" on steroids. The meal includes German, Philippine, Southern Soul Food, Italian, Irish, Polish, and Native American flavors. Despite divorces, remarriages, half-siblings, and steps, those at the table are family to my sister. EVERYONE has experienced humor and acceptance, tough love, and lots of hard knocks (in life, and probably across the knuckles at supper). Her children are as different as night and day and devoted to each other. Their brood of exes, currents, significant others, and various relations are all "FAMILY" on Facebook. When we visit, I spend half my time explaining to my husband (who also has only one brother with one wife, two children, and two grandchildren) who's on first, which came second, and when we'll go to the next graduation. That graduation could be Nebraska, Maryland, VA, or TX, depending on the school district and current loving relationship. My family is a CELEBRATION of LIFE that is not at all unusual. In light of the amplified energy of families like mine, Finest Hour offers a new type of commitment ceremony, the Family Unity Celebration. In this rite, we bring together not only the commitment of spouses, but the sacramental support of those who love them and whom they love. We can celebrate it at any time: marriage, birth, adoption, custody, or in legacy for a loved one whose special bond kept us connected when we were challenged by change or separation. Because our celebrations are tied to what makes each family special, like my family Thanksgiving, it will have a medley of flavors that represents the traditions, faiths, cultures, and common threads that have been woven by the family. In this time and place, many of my mature friends have joined families after their children are grown, and are sharing holidays, birthdays, and memorials with six or eight "grandparents." There is no WRONG time or place to celebrate FAMILY UNITY. Because every family is unique, it will take time to plan the events and design the rituals that will mean the most to everyone involved. Whether the gathering is solemn and sacramental, in a temple or chapel, or informal and followed by a potluck and games is completely up to the blenders! How do you honor the bond you share, and the differences in unity? |
AuthorI've been paid to sing, act, paint, teach and write. What I do most to express myself is write. I've self-published four books: poems, essays, stories, and prayers. Archives
December 2016
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NOW is our Finest Hour! | I*D*E*A*S* |